Should my child keep the two languages separate in different situations and with different people?
One key idea in raising children bilingually is that of language boundaries. Experts on bilingualism have traditionally placed stress on the importance of keeping the context of children's languages compartmentalized. For example, this will occur when one parent speaks one language and the other parent speaks a different language to the child. For this child, there is a clear division when listening to those two languages. Language separation makes it easy for children to recognize when they should speak which language to which parent.
A similar example with clear separation between two languages is dual language schools in the United States. In such schools, there is a set alternation of language. For example, on one day, curriculum content is taught through Spanish, the next day through English, rotating alternately to ensure both languages receive equal treatment in the curriculum. The central idea of alternate days with different languages is to maintain clear language boundaries. Rather than have a Tower of Babel confusion and a jumble of language production, language compartmentalization aids bilingual development.
The value of consistent language separation becomes more obvious when we consider a lack of partition. Imagine a parent who speaks both French and English to their child. This parent changes languages inside a ‘sentence' and across ‘sentences'. One outcome may be that the child will emulate the parent, mixing the languages inside a ‘sentence'. Very early on in a child's bilingual development, this is natural and to be tolerated. The older the child grows, the more important separation becomes. If a parent jumbles two languages, the child may consider that there is one overall language system. Therefore, mixing languages may become normal and natural to that child. Parents of bilingual children usually want to avoid such mixing early on.
Keeping languages separate with clear demarcation and boundaries between them will tend to make bilingual development more efficient, more socially acceptable and feed the child's language memory and language repertoire in a more appropriate way.
Children also tend to create their own (temporary) language boundaries, particularly when they are very young. For example, in the one parent, one language situation, a child may get used to speaking one language to the father only. The expected language boundary is that all men speak that language. All women are expected to speak a different language.
Family life is not always sufficiently simple to make language compartmentalization easy, particularly if a balance between languages is attempted. In the ‘one language/one parent' situation, there is the issue of which language parents speak to each other. Which language does a family speak when together (e.g. mealtimes)? Such a decision may tilt the balance towards one language rather than the other in the family. The guiding principle is for parents to try to achieve an approximate balance in the quality and quantity of the two languages as experienced by the child. This cannot be achieved mathematically, with equal percentages of time or stimulation. However, the balance needs careful thought and consideration. When brothers and sisters are part of the nuclear family, language interaction between siblings cannot be programmed so easily.
Parental discussion of language balance needs to include the dominance and status of the languages in the community, in school as well as in family life. For example, when one language is of lower prestige, that language may be given much more prominence in the home. A case in point is a father who speaks a majority language to the child, the mother speaking a minority language. The father needs to consider speaking the minority language in the home to raise its status in the eyes of the child.
Where both parents speak one language to their children, the question is what language to speak to their children when visitors are present. Do the parents stick to, for example, the minority language, or do they switch to the majority language so as not to exclude the visitors? Alternatively, as some experts advise, do parents carry on as usual, not disrupt normal language patterns, but translate for guests?
There is no simple answer about what to do when normal language patterns are disrupted. However, some guidelines are possible. First, it is desirable for parents to discuss in prospect or retrospect the general situations that occur most often. It is advantageous to plan ahead the language that will be used with strangers and with each other. An understanding in the family will give language strength to that family and present a common and stable situation for the visitor. Yet, and in paradox to this, it is important to be natural and well mannered, making language life enjoyable.
It is part of a bilingual's natural and usual repertoire to switch languages purposefully. After an initial period (during which a child learns that there are two different languages and is reasonably aware of that duality), there are many occasions when bilinguals valuably switch their languages in conversation: to emphasize ideas, convey important messages, relay past conversations. So switching language after the two languages are securely separated is a valuable part of a bilingual's language accomplishments that has function and purpose.